Absent Fathers by Bradshaw, Skinners, Smitson

By Bradshaw, Skinners, Smitson

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Sample text

At the time of the separation all the men found that it was difficult to concentrate and focus their attention on their jobs and they felt that their work performance had suffered. The self-employed financial adviser lost business and money and his problems were exacerbated by the fact that he had moved to another town to be near his wife, who had gone off to start a university degree. For all the sample, we found it was a time of great internal and external change, but nine of the men remained in the same job right through their marriage breakdown.

Victimisation’. The fathers felt victimised and outraged by their partners, and frequently asked themselves what they had done to deserve this treatment. The three men who were the most bitter, and remained bitter after many years, were the fathers whose wives had left them without any warning. One man who had been working abroad in India for two years received a letter from his wife telling him not to come home anymore, because she wanted a divorce. He maintained he did not know that there were any problems in the relationship.

6. Adultery and unreasonable behaviour were most commonly given as the grounds for divorce. In the Bradshaw and Millar (1991) study of lone parents, unreasonable behaviour was cited as the most common reason for divorce, though at that time irretrievable breakdown was not an option. Of those ex-married who had not yet been divorced, 51 per cent intended to obtain a divorce in the future. 6 Grounds for divorce 30 Absent Fathers? 8 Feelings about the breakup of the living-together relationship « Bradshaw and Millar, 1991.

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